*very vulnerable post & may be triggering* Ahhhh change room lighting the lighting that can make you go from having a good day to wtf my body looks like that???? I've been there before countless time – It's ruined full days for me, it's made me fall back into ED behaviours, it's made me cry and leave the store I don't know what it is about that damn lighting but all I know is it makes those so-called "flaws" that we've nearly killed ourselves trying to get rid of them up 17291819x more noticeable. But that's all over now. Why????? Because 1) I'm not full of "flaws" like the diet industry used to have me believe 2) I'm not wasting any more of my limited heartbeats on hating myself 3) my body deserves way more love & respect than that 4) my body is beautiful regardless of what lighting I'm in! And GUESS WHAT? Same goes for YOU!!!! Our lives are short. Yes, it is the longest thing we will ever experience BUT it is still short. How do YOU want to spend? I only wish I could get back the years I spent at war with my body. Instead of anxiety attacks, crying in the washroom and suicidal thoughts at family get-togethers I would've been enjoying my time with the ones I love laughing and eating good Italian food that I'm so fortunate that my Nonna makes us. And there's MANY more good times I missed out on due to hating myself and my body but I don't want to focus anymore on the negative Personally, I'm done spending another second like that I am learning to love myself and my body more and more each day. I've had plenty of ups and downs but I keep pushing through so changeroom lighting no longer bothers me (I never thought I'd say that) because of those 4 things above Self-love isn't easy as I've said 16927291x but I promise it is worth it #antihighlightreel #selfloveisthebestlove #yearofselflove #pt3
Brooke Spencer, a college student from Ontario, Canada, was feeling confident. Then she decided to go shopping.
“Ahhhh changing room lighting. The lighting that can make you go from having a good day to wtf my body looks like that???” began the 25-year-old former bodybuilder in a Tuesday, December 5, Instagram post. “I’ve been there before countless times — it’s ruined full days for me.”
Spencer, who battled an eating disorder when she was competing on the bodybuilding circuit, revealed that fitting rooms have caused her to fall back into unhealthy behaviors. “I don’t know what it is about that damn lighting but . . . it makes those so-called ‘flaws’ . . . 7291819x more noticeable,” she wrote.
This past weekend was my boyfriend's Christmas party and I got to dress up, do my hair, makeup and wear a dress & heels and I felt goooood. Yes, this is more of a "highlight reel" photo in a sense of my posing, however I still felt uncomfortable with my lower stomach (something that's always been a struggle for me) A few years ago it consumed the majority of my thoughts and I was trying to hide it all the time Not anymore though! I laughed, I met people, I drank, I ate and enjoyed an amazing night with my boyfriend and I loved every minute. Living life > dieting/hating my body #selfloveisthebestlove #yearofselflove #pt3 #antihighlightreel
In the past, Spencer would have run out of the store crying. But not that day. “I’m not wasting any more of my limited heartbeats on hating myself,” she revealed. ”My body is beautiful is beautiful regardless of what lighting I’m in! And GUESS WHAT? Same goes for YOU!!!”
Spencer lamented the years she wasted “at war” with her reflection and revealed that she often spent family get-togethers crying in bathroom instead of eating her Nonna’s “good Italian food.”
“Personally, I’m done spending another second like that,” she vowed. “I am learning to love myself and my body more and more each day.”
Spencer’s message received more than than 1,000 likes.
“If I hadn’t spent the past three years working towards loving my body, that changing room would have led to a breakdown,” she tells Us Weekly. “That moment is when I realized I need to take a photo and post it on Instagram. I try to be as open and vulnerable and I don’t want to leave out any parts that I think could help others, even if it’s hard for me to post.”